JoeyJoJo

Patrick and the Spaghetti Western Orchestra

2012-02-14T09:56:00.006Z

I have no idea how I've managed to collect such an amazing group of friends. Over the weekend I was lucky enough to have one come and stay from Melbourne Australia.
Patrick's life has gradually polished him like a pebble to make him into the most amazing man. He grew up in a tiny Mallee town called Nyah West in the North West of Victoria. In 2006 it had a population of 552. You can practically hear the tumbleweeds going through the town in this photo of the milkbar that Patrick's family used to run as "Cronins café".
Nowadays Patrick has used his magical ability to whistle & his talents of comedy, trumpet playing and stagecraft to work together a band of worlwide fame. Using his tumbleweed connections to the American wild west, he and 4 other very talented blokes have created the Spaghetti Western Orchestra. Here is a list of the instruments they play in the show.....
Asthma Inhaler, Bass Recorder, Bassoon, Bells, Birdwings Sound Effect, Body Drop
Sound Effect, Bouncy Ball Pump, Castanets, Chickens Sound Effect, Child Sized
Boot, Claves, Coat Hangers (2), Concert Bass Drum, Concert Tom Toms, Cornflakes
(Small Packet and Large Packet), Creaky Door Sound Effect, Deck Of Cards, Double
Bass, Drum Kit, Dutch Clog & Tambourine Jingles, Egg Shakers, Electronic Sampler,
Fake Glasses, Film Canister, Bird Whistle, Finger Cymbals (2), Footsteps Sound Effect,
Frog Clicker, Harmonica (Working), Harmonica (Broken), Horseshoe, Jews Harps (6),
Kat Midi Controller (2 Octaves), Kitchen Knife with Sharpening Steel, Latchbolt Sound
Effect, Mandolin, Maracas (I Pair), Melodeon (2), Nail Clippers, Nail File, Ocarina, One
Note Saxophone, Orchestral Whip, Packaging Tape (1 Roll), Pan Pipes, Piano, Plastic
Bags (2), Policeman’s Whistle, Ratchet, Reel- To-Reel Tape Machine, Sticks And Twigs
(Locally Sourced), String Can, Suspended Cymbals, Synthesizer, Tam Tam, Tasmanian
Lottery Balls, Theremin, Timpani (3), Tin Whistle (5), Trumpet, Tuned Beer Bottles (11),
Two Tone Whistle, Ukulele, Vibraphone Wind Machine, Wooden Cowbells.

I went to see them on Sunday night in Cambridge and was blown away. The last time I saw them play was 10 years ago in a small venue in Melbourne, they were wonderful then, they are awe inspiring now.
(Richard and I went on our first date to see Patrick in another incarnation with his partner in 'Sally Ford & the Pachuco Playboys' and they were also a marvel.)

If you can I urge you to go and see the show, it's like nothing else you've ever seen before. As one of their splendid reviews says... A witty collage of stylised film dialogue, improvised soundtracks and sound effects. A masterpiece of first class arrangements of Ennio Morricone’s music, lovingly interspersed film quotations, and stunning acoustic and visual gags. Fully loaded musical theatre done to perfection. Don’t miss it!

Great Hockham Mothers Union banner

2012-02-01T16:47:00.007Z

A while ago a friend came to me with a plastic bag filled with something in the way of fabric in a very sorry state. She quietly told me that she'd noticed the Mother's Union banner at Church had been very grubby indeed so she washed it. The entire background of silk had rotted away and the embroidery was sadly in need of some tender care. Could I please have a look at it and see what I could do.
I love these kinds of jobs and have absolutely loved every minute of restoring this old and very beautiful thing. I had to use tweezers to pull out the old threads and it was fascinating to see what was underneath.Appliqueing primroses is a therapeutic exercise on a cold and wintry day.

and though replacing the threads around the lettering was a painstaking job, it was worth while in the end.
Luckily the embroidery and applique of the mother and child was still in good condition. It's extremely hard to make faces look good with fabric, it's where the real Art lies in this sort of piece and this one is beautifully done.
The work that no one sees is just as important as without this stitching , the banner would bag and look like a sack. I was able to use the original interlining but it was very thick linen and I ended up with plasters all over my fingers as I stabbed & stabbed again to get the needle in exactly the right spot.
Finally though it's finished. I'm very pleased with it and hopefully it will last another hundred years or so.

New and even more exotic cushions

2012-01-20T14:40:00.005Z

Sorry it's been so long since I posted anything here. I've been busy as usual and now have a streaming cold. I'm looking forward to a nice night in though with my favourite dinner of salmon with spinach, new potatoes and sauce vierge; a fish dinner seems to have miraculous healing powers.
Today has been a very low day indeed, the weather has been wet & cold all day and I haven't been able to warm up. Setting up the bedroom however to take these photos warmed me up and cheered me up too. There's something so satisfying about making your environment nice.
I acquired this absolutely beautiful piece of embroidery that I've made into quite a glamorous cushion. The colours and the stitching are exquisite and I chose a pale pink silk taffeta to make a pleated frill round the outside.
I bought this lovely striated ribbon in Melbourne when I was there at this time last year.
just look at the detail in this cherry blossom.
I've also cheered myself up with this lemony combination after listening to Woman's hour on radio 4 when they were talking about pastels being in this season. I never see myself as someone who follows fashion trends but this is a happy coincidence.

I've also decided to sell this beautiful bit of textile joy. I've been meaning to make it into a cushion but it's the wrong shape really so I thought maybe one of you out there might like to make use of it instead. The sparrows in flight are just the most wonderful things. Animated and cleverly done with amazing shading.

There are more details on the website

That's all for now. I'm off to cook dinner and fall into the sack.
I do have another blog in the pipeline though about my recent trip to Scotland. I'll finish it off this weekend some time and show you my reasons for becoming a Scotlophile.

Scootland

2012-01-13T19:32:00.007Z

As you all know who read this blog regularly, I have great friends. The ones who I want to introduce you to in this post are my buddies Tat & Is. Tat is a writer who Ricardo & I met while she was studying creative writing at the UEA and Is is her partner. They are one hell of a special pair.When Richard was ill, Tat would send the most wonderful letters with pictures and poems and sparkling stars that fell out as soon as you opened the heart covered envelopes. There was one in particular that I put up next to the bed so Richard could see it as soon as he woke in the mornings. It was a huge full colour picture of Desmond Tutu beaming out of the page in his vibrant purple cassock with his hands opening toward you in a heartfelt blessing. It made you feel good to just look at it.
They offered to have me come & stay with them in Scotland over Christmas and New year. I was thrilled. I felt exhausted with the lead up to Christmas and looked forward to taking some time out from worrying about everything as well as pushing the giant boulder of grief uphill. I would maybe knit a bit and read some books and sleep too.
I got much more than I bargained for.... Tat plays the fiddle and Isra plays the guitar, their friend Will brought her ukelele too. They had all gone to enormous trouble and gave me a stocking full of heartfelt gifts that spoke of me and of Scotland, with a special porridge stirrer called a spurtle, the Tin tin book 'The black island', that's set in Scotland, a book about the Broons family, some Tablet! a pencil & eraser with musical notes for choir, a book about Charles Rennie Makintosh, and the most gorgeous soap from Purdies of Argyll. Not for one minute did I feel far away from family or sad at missing my best buddy. Is had rented a holiday cottage which was small but perfectly formed on the banks of Loch Awe at a place called Dalavich and we had an absolute ball, playing cards, knitting, walking, eating, sleeping, laughing fit to burst, playing more cards and singing, even though it rained non stop the whole time we were there and we barely saw daylight.
One of the books I'd taken with me to read was Witchlight by Susan Fletcher and is one of the best books I've ever read. Part of the story is set in Glencoe. Here's what the Guardian said about it ..........‘Corrag's descriptions combine the oblique originality of a child with the precision and control of a poet…the novel is crowded with images stunning in their freshness and simplicity…there are moments when the sheer beauty of the prose takes one's breath away…it is a novel of extraordinary beauty and quiet power that is impossible, having read it, not to look at the world anew'.
I wished with all my heart that the girls would pick up on my longing to go to Glencoe and to read the book...and....they did. They decided we would make the pilgrimage and Is read the book all the way as we passed through a more and more amazing landscape.
Richard had been bowled over by Glencoe when he went there in the 1980's and reckoned you could here the sounds of sword & sheild clashing in that mighty Glen.
Will said it was like a car wash for the soul. I've never seen such an amazing landscape nor so much rain. Every tiny dip in the mountains was racing with white water.

Here is a poem Tat sent me that captures it completely.
Title: Glencoe
Author: G. K. Chesterton

The star-crowned cliffs seem hinged upon the sky,
The clouds are floating rags across them curled,
They open to us like the gates of God
Cloven in the last great wall of all the world.

I looked, and saw the valley of my soul
Where naked crests fight to achieve the skies,
Where no grain grows nor wine, no fruitful thing,
Only big words and starry blasphemies.

But you have clothed with mercy like a moss
The barren violence of its primal wars,
Sterile although they be and void of rule,
You know my shapeless crags have Wed the stars.

How shall I thank you, O courageous heart.
That of this wasteful world you had no fear;
But bade it blossom in clear faith and sent
Your fair flower-feeding rivers: even as here

The peat burns brimming from their cups of stone
Glow brown and blood-red down the vast decline
As if Christ stood on yonder clouded peak
And turned its thousand waters into wine.

So let's raise a glass and toast these incredible friends and their hearts so full of passion, music and the mysteryof life.

Dr Karl

2011-12-05T19:06:00.006Z

One of the things I love most about Australian radio is Dr Karl and I logged onto the radio station called Triple J recently to hear his hysterically funny and educational talk back programme today only to find that it had been his 30Th anniversary of being on Triple J. If you have half an hour to spare please pull up a chair and listen to this fantastic programme. He's a living treasure is Dr Karl whose maxim is the quote from Socrates "The unexamined life is not worth living."
The JJJ presenters must have had a lot of fun deciding what kind of cake to make for him but seeing as his favourite organ is the Uterus, it was an obvious choice to make a uterus cake!Here he is getting all teary with his gorgeous wife
Love you Dr Karl. You've brightened many a long sewing project.

VOGUE!!!!!

2011-12-05T09:37:00.004Z

It's not every day that Vogue magazine plops onto your doormat with one of your cushions in it! QUICK unwrap it fast.
Noooo that's not me on the cover, but I may think of doing my hair this way for a certain forthcoming birthday bash.
It's here.... get out the magnifying glass and see if you can read it. They did brilliant things with the words. Who ever thought Exotic cushions would sound so glamorous!

Now let the games begin.

The latest exotic-ness

2011-11-25T10:20:00.007Z

Today's the day! I'm having a Christmas exhibition here in East Harling with my friends who are both extremely talented girls. Sheila McDonald who makes stunning enamed jewelery and Maz Jackson who makes vibrant artwork using egg tempera and gold leaf.I've been beavering away in the workroom sewing cushions for weeks now and you'd think I'd run out of inspiration but it never happens. All I can think about is whether I'll have time to make all the cushions that live in my head. This time I've made more than one of a few of the really popular designs, as last time I had an exhibition people all seemed to want the ones that had sold.

I'm really excited because friends are coming from all over to have a look. The main question though is what on earth to wear?
I've used some of my really precious pieces and will be sorry to see say goodbye to these in particular with their peacock.. and bluebird of happiness embroideryIt's been ages since I managed to get anything onto the website and I'm sure people think I've dissapeared of the Exotic Cushions radar, it's just been so nice to just sit and make rather than dashing round the bedroom with lights, camera & various bits of fabric to then resize all the images, then write a description and upload everything etc etc. A few marvelous things have happened though, I did get a wonderful random phone call the other day from a man with a shop in Wiltshire saying he'd just found my site and wanted to know whether I wholesaled? I love the random things that happen from having my website out there. I also had a phone call from Vogue asking if I would like to put some cushions into the magazine. Oh My Goodness!! Of course I said yes please. It comes out on the 3rd of December so will be perfect timing for Christmas.I'd love to hear from anyone reading this though if they are a designer/manufacturer that manages to do the wholesale/retail thing. Please don't be shy, leave me a comment.
I've also been reading a few interesting blogs lately that were on a list in the Independent on Sunday. This is one of my favourites. Called Junkaholique.com all about a girl named Artemis and her partner Nao who make beautiful things and take wonderful photos.

Here there and everywhere

2011-10-20T19:21:00.010Z

When Ricardo the Magnificent died, I thought my life was over; there would be no more travel, no more fun, no more good food, no more meeting interesting people, no more singing and no more money. I'm glad (and slightly guilty) to say that this has not been the case.
Somehow good things keep on coming.
I've posted before about my wonderful friends Brad & Tamara who live in Rome. Tamara is a cushion addict like me; ............this cushion is one I prepared earlier for her, sitting on her beautiful turquoise chair.When she came to visit me recently, she designed 6 or 7 cushions for me to make and she convinced me that it would cost almost as much to bring the cushions to Rome myself ...
as it would to post them to Italy. (I didn't need much convincing). So without further ado, for one night only, I went to Rome.
It was the most beautiful day as I waited at Stansted airport for my flight.and though it looks like it was raining as I came in on the bus, it was warm and perfect weather...about 10C degrees warmer than here in Norfolk.
Going for one day was never going to be enough time but it meant that I really REALLY took in everything around me as if it was my last day on earth.
Here I am making like a fountain on the capitoline hill.
Everywhere you look there are amazing views.
and spectacular works of art.
I'd been recomended to go and eat at a Restaurant called La Botticella; the reviews of it sounded too good to be true but indeed it lived up to our expectations easily. The true Italian experience, with washing hanging in the lane above our heads. The owner is cook, maitre d', waitress, dishwasher & singer of opera. We ate Zuchini blooms stuffed with bocconcini and anchovies, dipped in batter & deep fried followed by a selection of 3 different pastas then Tira misu. We were fit to burst. Luckily it was a fair walk home taking in the life of the streets, still packed at 10 at night.
In other news to hand, my friends Tony & Marianne Backhouse (the ones who recommended the restaurant in Rome) came to visit and Tony graced us with a workshop in singing a'cappela. He's bloody good at what he does. See if you can catch the spirit in this video of him putting us through our paces at East Harling Church

Bristol

2011-09-22T15:45:00.007Z

People sometimes ask me if I worry about putting my life out into the world with this blog. But this blog has brought me nothing but good.
When my Father died and I wrote about it here a wonderful girl named Kelly from Boston wrote her condolences and became a fast friend. Through Kelly's blog I discovered Earwig sandwich and the wonderful Lulu Labonne.
I have only met Lulu twice before, one of which was last year when Richard was sick; she drove all the way to Norfolk to meet him and brought an incredible array of marvelous food and cooked us a delicious meal. I'm so glad they got to meet.
Lulu had a large birthday this week and to help her celebrate, I drove to Bristol. I have discovered that I quite like driving and the four hours or so it took me to get there were a joy with good things on the radio all the way.
Once there I was slightly nervous about spending a weekend at a surprise birthday at which I knew only one person.

But Bristol is an amazing city throbbing with life...

and great street art.
I shouldn't have worried; I was wrapped around by love.
Hilary's husband had organised a canoe-ing adventure on the river Wye and everyone was in such high spirits that there was no time to be nervous.
There was a champagne picnic and much hilarity
and even though it rained...
and there was a LOT of cow poo beside the river Wye...
There were King fishers and Peregrine falcons and the lowest rainbow I'd ever seen (that pot of gold must have been REALLY close by).
So this little bunny will be going to Bristol again as soon as I can to get some more time with that most excellent girl Lulu Labonne. Thank you blog land and the wonderful world wide web.

Cushions????

2011-09-02T11:01:00.004Z

Are you saying I have a thing about cushions? Cushions?... who me noooooo surely not.

Well maybe just a tiny bit!

Oh alright then maybe I DO.

The Bridgham féte is on and I'm packing up all these little gems to take there this weekend. It's actually really nice to have them all in the house at the moment. Maybe I'll let myself roll around in them for a while.....

Verfeil sur Seye

2011-08-22T13:48:00.010Z

Well hello loyal blog readers. I bring you the latest post from France where it is VERY sunny indeed. A scorching 39 degrees. I'm staying with my very good friends Sally & John in their house in Verfeil sur Seye near Toulouse & Albi in south west France.

You can tell I'm in France as the photography turns to food... although I'm not sure these cakes would make it to the artisanal bakery!

I discovered you can buy macarons in the freezer section of the supermarket here and that small fact has lead me to thoughts of making them again; all I need is a freezer; anyone, anyone.......... I can pay you in Macarons.

These following I hasten to ad were NOT frozen and also very, very good. This larger raspberry variety of macaron are traditionally known as an Isfahan because of their rose scent. Isfahan is the name of a province in Iran famous for its damask roses. I'm afraid they didn't last long enough to sniff all that much.

And my one weakness.... Ile Flottante
After lunch we slunk from shady spot to shadow along the hot pavements of Albi to view one of the most impressive buildings I've ever seen and indeed the largest brick building in the world. Albi cathedral is an absolute monster, its tallest point, the bell tower stands 78 metres or 256 feet tall.

From the heights of Albi, just so you don't feel too insignificant I must let you know that they too have the ever present dead conifer amidst their architecture.
Which brings us to a nice segue into this fascinating bit of ivy covered architecture in one of the back streets near Sally & John's. A storm was brewing and the sky really was this colour!

Van Gogh eat your heart out.
Sally & John have been fabulous hosts

with aperitifs amongst many, many other delicious meals ...

A walk in the woods nearby.

I've never experienced a landscape like this one. If you narrowed your eyes, you could imagine yourself in the Australian bush but just a little bit greener. It was so hot, the cicadas were the only thing stirring. As we silently walked our way along the rocky paths we came upon these ancient burial mounds called Dolmens or stone tables. Strange and awe inspiring, they brought more questions than answers about how on earth prehistoric man managed to shift these enormously heavy stones.

We also managed to have breakfast in one of Frances most charming medieval market towns, Saint-Antonin-Noble-Val.

Ricardo and I came here in 2009 and it has not changed at all, which was good and bad as you can imagine.

Sorry to leave you on a sad note. Hopefully these baby swallows will cheer you as they did me although swallows always remind me of loss too as they are here for so short a stay.

A perfect day

2011-08-17T16:28:00.007Z

Clarissa May and Yusuf are engaged.

They picked the perfect day to do it. After an enormous amount of hard work putting up marquees

and a bouncy castle for the kids, making the garden spick and span and a lot of rain, the sky cleared and filled with bubbles instead of clouds.

I'll give you a tip - well maybe two - to a perfect and happy relationship and Clarry & Yusuf have it down perfectly. It goes like this - when Clarry comes downstairs after having a shower, Yusuf says "Gosh you look lovely" and she replies to him "I just love you" and that's it, so simple and yet so scarce. Ricardo and I had it and have now passed on the baton.

I'm so happy to pass it on to such a wonderful pair. When they got together we were all convinced that it would be a one night stand but that one night seemed to turn into every night and I think they were even more surprised than their friends.

I heard the whole lovely story after the big party clean up as we worked away at a mountain of dishes in the kitchen. My eyes filled with tears as Clarry described the first time she kissed Yusuf and felt like she was surrounded by a golden light.

The special occasion had everyone in an amorous mood.

Zebby must have bounced on that bouncy castle for eight hours solid and was so happy to be surrounded by such love. Here he is with one of his all time favourites, Rach.

and at last after a big big day, a bonfire and fireworks. Yay. May they live happily ever after. (Oh whoops there's a wedding to get through yet. How on earth are we going to top this?)

A rare day off

2011-07-27T16:28:00.003Z

Today had to go on hold because the electricity was turned off all day.
I had to decide, would I rail against it or just give in. Hey I'm the glass half full type so I let myself have a rare day off. After my walk and meditation this morning early, I started franticly emailing, ringing, planning my day when the power suddenly died. I breathed a sigh of relief and went back to bed. A luxurious couple of hours sleep ensued.
After lunch I strolled around to my friend Clarry's for cups of tea and chocolate cake with her and Zebbie; phew, so nice to get off the treadmill for a while.
I have however been enjoying the treadmill very much lately with some gorgeous commissions. Take a look at these bright beauties for Tamara in Rome.

.... and I can post pictures of these now too. Cushions for my friend Tat who celebrated her 40th birthday on the 31st of July, and her wonderful partner ordered these for her. Tat has a thing about marone and I found these beautiful pieces to make up into some cushions.

including a precious piece of ecclesiastic embroidery.
I hope she likes them. Happy birthday Tat. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Summer exhibition

2011-07-20T16:57:00.009Z

Sorry it's been a week or so without a blog post but there's been so much to do to catch up after my two weekends away from the computer.
The exhibition last weekend went really well. I sold more cushions than ever before and the really nice thing was that it was mostly local people from East Harling that bought things. I'd made quite a few cheaper cushions thinking that because of the recession no one will buy anything expensive! On the contrary, I was left with all the cheaper ones and the most expensive and glamorous cushions went on the first day.
Here are some pictures of them on site at Sheila's house, unfortunately it was pretty dark and cosy in there so I had to use the flash.The one below on the right on the window sill, sold before we even opened the doors and almost every person after that wanted to buy it too. I can't get any more of that particular fabric but I have managed to find some with the same patterns of embroidery but in a different and even more gorgeous colourway
Here are the three exhibitors looking slightly gaga after all the hard work of getting everything ready. Maz Jackson on the left, Sheila McDonald in the middle and me trying to look keen on the right.
Here's Sheila looking a bit more relaxed in amongst her glass cases of beautiful enamel ware.
This is what she does...and another photo a little bright and hard to see though.

Here's Maz..
and her beautiful work, using egg tempera and gold leaf.
Thanks girls for a wonderful event and if you missed it, we'll be doing it again closer to Christmas. Email me if you would like details as to where and when on exocush@hotmail.com

Joe and Fern's wedding

2011-07-12T20:04:00.009Z

Phew. At last I can sit down at my sewing machine and sew, instead of racing around a makeshift kitchen for hour after hour a bit like the white rabbit in Alice in wonderland. I've been away helping a couple of friends cater for a wedding in Worcester. We worked for 17 and a half hours on Friday (after I twisted my ankle on Thursday catching my foot in a rabbit hole). Ouch. It didn't however stop me from dancing crazily for hours on Saturday night in the fabulous circus big top that Joe and Fern (the happy couple) had erected for the weekend.
I must admit that the wedding, was the most UNBELIEVABLE wedding, (no, make that EVENT) I've ever been to. The wedding bar has been raised and will not be seen this high for at least a year or so to come.
We had all sorts of helpers though...
this was the kitchen that we had to work in...it took Clarry and Lisa 8 hours solid to make all the mini sausage rolls.
the only way to stir that much sausage mince was to get right in there up to your elbows.
We made hampers for 200 people. Here's one we prepared earlier.
Joe and Fern had booked the whole campsite of the most amazing farm and recording studio called "The Hatch" here's a photo from their website (I hope they'll forgive me for using it).Everyone brought tents and camped in the orchard.
A great time was had by all.

This is what it looked like apré wedding!After it was all over, I decided to keep going West and make a short detour to Wales instead of setting off at 6pm on Sunday for the 4-5 hour trip back to Norfolk.
We have Welsh ancestors somewhere in our lineage and I'm not sure if it was autosuggestion or not but it looked REALLY familiar. I drove to Brecon and stayed in the quietest hotel you could ever wish for. I slept for 10 and a half hours solid.
And guess what? Wales is beautiful just like everybody says.
What the hell were those green shapes in the landscape though??? Oh I get it they're hills.

On fire

2011-07-05T15:06:00.006Z

Somehow in the last few weeks, I've managed to get organised.
I've managed to go for a walk every weekday morning at 6.45 with my friend Cath...
then come home and meditate for 20 minutes. (No image for that as it would be really boring for you to have to look at the insides of MY eyelids).
I've managed to not spend toooo much time checking my emails and facebook. (No image for that either for much the same reasons).
And, AND....... I've been managing to tie myself down to the sewing machine and make lots of cushions.
I've had quite a few commissions lately. The first, some bolsters for a narrow boat called 'Moonbow'. The leaf printed silk came from a friend in Australia and it's so soft and luxurious.
The next was for a cushion for a girl who teaches yoga (crikey I hope she doesn't read this blog as I've just posted it off to her and I think it's a surprise). Her lovely partner got in touch with me after seeing a cushion that was only on the website for about 2 days. You might recognise the purple and green theme from the tiny Liberty miniatures.

I took photos of the precious pieces I had left that we could use and this one took his fancy. It's ancient and from an altar cloth that had mostly disintegrated.
The last commission was for a tenth wedding anniversary present.
The tenth anniversary is symbolised by tin so we made it from silver silk. I appliqued their initials in gold kid on the sides of the silk.

and I used one of the last pieces of this beautiful embroidered fabric from an "Uchikake" or wedding kimono.
Finally after finishing those pieces, I started to make cushions for an exhibition that I'm having on the weekend of the 15th, 16th, and 17th of July. (If you'd like an invite, email me and I'll let you know where to come ..... exocush@hotmail.com)
More of that stunning pastel embroidery.
so thick you could eat it.

Mid Summer

2011-06-24T12:37:00.008Z

I thought it was about time I relieved you all of the sad D.H. Lawrence poem in the previous post!
So here are some photos of what's been happening in the world of summer in Harling.
Whenever Spring and then summer hit here, I always forget about certain flowers and the ones I've forgotten this year are the hollyhocks.When I was little our Nanna used to have the obligatory Crinoline Lady embroidered tablecloths. I always loved their fairy book quality and never thought such flowers or places really existed. Then I came to Harling and found they did.
Look at this double beauty.
The first time I saw a snakes head fritilary, I was flabergasted that the flowers I'd thought were made up, were real. How could you possibly think that a checkerboard flower was real?
Inspired by the colours of the fritilary, I decided to send some tiny models off to Liberty to see if I could interest them in my cushions. I've had some of these tiny fragments of embroidery for at least 20 years now and never been able to use them on anything before as they were so tiny. It was like making dolls clothes and took me easily as long or longer to make them than full size ones. I was swearing as I unpicked the tiny piping on the bolster for the third time to get it just right. Luckily no tiny zips were involved.
The perfect pieces of olive green silk with embroidery on them were from some old vestments that were in the main part, too tattered to use. The stitching on them is immaculate. The regal purple velvet was a perfect frame for them.

Let's hope they like them.

My favourite poem

2011-06-15T14:15:00.001Z

D.H. Lawrence
MOUNTAIN LION

Climbing through the January snow, into the Lobo Canyon
Dark grow the spruce-trees, blue is the balsam, water sounds still unfrozen, and the trail is still evident

Men!
Two men!
Men! The only animal in the world to fear!

They hesitate.
We hesitate.
They have a gun.
We have no gun.

Then we all advance, to meet.

Two Mexicans, strangers, emerging our of the dark and
snow and inwardness of the Lobo valley.
What are they doing here on this vanishing trail?

What is he carrying?
Something yellow.
A deer?

Que' tiene amigo?
Leon-

He smiles foolishly as if he were caught doing wrong.
And we smile, foolishly, as if we didn't know.
He is quite gentle and dark-faced.

It is a mountain lion,
A long, long, slim cat, yellow like a lioness.
Dead.

He trapped her this morning, he says, smiling foolishly.

Life up her face,
Her round, bright face, bright as frost.
Her round, fine-fashioned head, with two dead ears;
And stripes in the brilliant frost of her face, sharp, fine dark rays,
Dark, keen, fine rays in the brilliant frost of her face.
Beautiful dead eyes.

Hermoso es!

They go out towards the open;
We go out into the gloom of Lobo.
And above the trees I found her lair,
A hole in the blood-orange brilliant rocks that stick up, a little cave.
And bones, and twigs, and a perilous ascent.

So, she will never leap up that way again, with the yellow flash of a mountain lion's long shoot!
And her bright striped frost-face will never watch any more, out of the shadow of the cave in the blood- orange rock,
Above the trees of the Lobo dark valley-mouth!

Instead, I look out.
And out to the dim of the desert, like a dream, never real;
To the snow of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains, the ice of the mountains of Picoris,
And near across at the opposite steep of snow, green trees motionless standing in snow, like a Christmas toy.

And I think in this empty world there was room for me and a mountain lion.
And I think in the world beyond, how easily we might spare a million or two humans
And never miss them.
Yet what a gap in the world, the missing white frost-face of that slim yellow mountain lion!

D.H. Lawrence (1885-1930) was an English novelist, poet, and essayist famed both for his writing and for his unconventional opinions.

London with Tamara

2011-06-07T18:04:00.009Z

When I feel inspired to write a post here I find myself swerving toward the positive. I guess I keep my sad times to myself. They still happen and they usually take the form of NOT writing on the blog. Conspicuous by my absence I guess.
I also find that I often use this platform as a method of giving thanks, usually for great friends helping me out in various ways.
One of those helping me out at the moment is the wonderful Tamara. I met Tamara recently when I found myself talking nervously to her husband in a Ryanair queue on my recent visit to Rome. He tucked me under his wing and took me home to meet his wife Tamara and their kids. We got on famously. We are the same age and both have a creative streak. It's amazing to have a partner in crime of exactly the same age to compare all sorts of things from hair removal tips to musical taste.
Tamara rang a week or so ago and asked if I'd like to accompany her to the Paris Open! I must admit I was at a very low ebb and saw nothing but fear in going so far from home. She coaxed and cajoled and I tried my best to get her to come closer to me this time. I finally wore her down and even got her to come to East Harling on the promise of that most English of experiences...the inauguration of a new village vicar, complete with 40 strong robed choir, Bishops, bell ringing and a fabulous supper. She was a very gracious and enthusiastic guest.
After I'd fed her a few meals and felt I'd evened up the score of hospitality a bit, I let her take me to London for an all expenses paid birthday treat. Phew. Just in the nick of time as my confidence in my abilities and my creativity was waning. We walked and walked and I felt I earned a small amount of kudos by being the map reader and guide. Tamara has a keen interest in street art and seeing it through her eyes I became a huge fan too of this most optimistic of creative pursuits. The first piece we saw was this incredible and huge heron on the side of a wall in Bricklane It must have been 30 feet high and when we came around the corner it made me catch my breath and brought tears to my eyes. How on earth did they get it here?
Walking around this East London area was amazing; another planet compared to what I see normally here in Norfolk. The artwork seemed so cheeky and easy, painted on scraps of newspaper or chiseled out of the fabric of the wall itself.
Most of my time is spent franticly trying to make money out of my creativity and to see it thrown onto a wall for everyone to see and enjoy was such a breath of fresh air. No tickets to buy, no strings attached, just Art for Arts sake.
Kooky and beautifully vibrant.
Sad and political.

Exuberant and full of colour.

Pretty
and textured.
Hilarious
and downright clever

So thanks Tamara for a truly amazing few days in one of the most amazing cities in the world. No need to be scared of weazels any more!

Birthday lunch

2011-05-26T17:14:00.006Z

Another of the anniversaries that I wasn't really looking forward to lately was my birthday. In the end it was truly wonderful. It kept on and on over the whole weekend and beyond with time spent with my lovely friends. On Friday, the day before my birthday, Clarissa and Lisa had organised champagne and cake in the backyard of Lisa's house, with bunting and sunshine.
The sun shone and a LOT of cake was consumed. Having a serious effect on my cleavage!
After I came home from the party, a large box was sitting on my doorstep with this bunch of spectacular flowers from my Sister Suez. How often do you get a bunch like this. Peonies, pink hydrangeas and pink roses with pale green edges.
Then on the saturday of my actual birthday, we went to a sculpture trail at a small village called Burgh Apton with Clarissa and Zebby and my gorgeous little buddy Grace. A picnic was prepared.
and a lot more cake was consumed.
The sun shone AGAIN and the air around the gardens smelled strongly of mock orange.
and cow parsley.

This was my favourite sculpture of all.
and here's Clarissa giving it all she's got. There is no way I can do this yoga move.
a long and tiring day but completely wonderful. Thanks gang.

Race for life

2011-05-15T20:29:00.007Z

I had no idea what to expect at a huge charity fundraiser. I don't really like large organised events. However I was humbled and bowled over by the feeling of heartfelt respect and the sheer numbers that attended this race for life at the Norwich Showgrounds. This was one of 4 races this weekend and there were thousands of people there. It makes you realise what an epidemic cancer is. My best buddy and a few other lovely friends were making it real in a most outrageous way. Here's Sarah (with Clarissa and Zebbie) in her burlesque outfit (plus last minute t-shirt purchase!)

and Kerry looking immaculate at the end of the race.
I was number one Zebbie wrangler so I saw quite a bit of the bouncy castle, but the signs on peoples backs brought tears and a huge lump in my throat that stayed with me the whole day. Big or small, fat or thin, old or young, everyone was there with a huge sense of purpose.
Richard would have been very proud of you lovelies. Thanks Clarry for battling through even with a bad back.
and Big daddy Russ, we couldn't have done it without your motivational moves!

As a

Clarribelle

2011-05-08T20:39:00.003Z

My amazing friend and all-round wonder-woman, Clarissa is running for Richard in the Norwich race for life next Sunday. If you would like to sponsor her and really blow her out of the water then go here now

Royal wedding

2011-05-05T17:36:00.011Z

This morning at Church, I bumped into my lovely friend Chris Tagg. She stayed up last night until 2am reading the blog and I promised her a new post today about my Royal Wedding Day out a couple of Fridays ago. Here we are Chris, this ones for you....
I went to the village of Banham which is close by as they were having a party on the green. By the time I got to my friends' Kate and David's house at about 10.30, I was really excited. On the way over, I'd been listening to BBC radio 2 and they had had great music playing, culminating in the fabulous wedding anthem by that raucous soul belter, Yvonne Fair 'It should have been me'.
I'd been singing along so loudly that I didn't realise until I got out of the car that all six bells at Banham Church were ringing. (You'll just have to imagine the sound ... actually if you listen here you might be able to hear something similar). This is Banham Church where our friend David Hill is Rector.This is David with his son Cuthbert... Bertie has inherited his Father's love of dressing up.This is his beautiful wife Kate, standing with Cuthbert and I resplendant in our matching Union-Jack-tea-towel aprons. Banham had put on a wonderful show and this is what greeted us as we walked over to the Green.People had gone to a lot of trouble to dress up. There was a wonderful Queen Elizabeth the First, as well as this woman dressed as Emmeline Pankhurst who stayed in the role all day shouting "Votes for women" at frequent intervals.
Kate had gone to a lot of trouble to make a picnic with roast beef sandwiches and strawberries & cream. We drank champagne (it had its inevitable results of giving me an instant headache.)
Then back to the green for races. There weren't enough grown-ups to compete in the wheelbarrow races so this clown juggled instead!winning by a narrow margin...
Although the judge had imbibed a lot of Champagne by then!
The lovely Owen had organised his horse Kahn and cart (yes it's the one we had for Richard's funeral)
A grand day out indeed. It seems to have lifted everone's spirits to have some sunshine and a wedding.

Ricardo's birthday

2011-04-28T18:07:00.004Z

Richard's birthday was fast approaching and I had no idea what to do. After posting a plea on facebook to ask for any ideas, my friend and Richard's ex wife Jeannie suggested I throw a party to celebrate, rather than sit and wait for sadness to overtake me. Thus the blue suede shoes were brought out...
I made his favourite liquorice cake (recipe courtesy of Jeannie)..
and invited a whole gang of friends to come over.
As people arrived and I opened the door, I could see their faces were full of concern. Would this be an OK event or would we stand around in small groups crying? Luckily as the room filled up with people, cakes and laughter, I realised I'd done the right thing.
Happy birthday my darling.

Anniversaries

2011-04-25T09:00:00.003Z

I am trying to not worry about things that haven't happened yet (as Ricardo used to constantly remind me) but there are some pretty tricky anniversaries coming up and I wondered if any of my friends out there in blog land had any ideas.
It will have been Richard's 64th birthday this Thursday and I have no idea how a widow goes about celebrating such a thing. If anyone has any ideas, I'd love it if you could leave me a small comment. Thanks gang.
P.S. I found this spiderweb on my walk this morning there were hundreds of them in the grass. Beautiful.

The kindness of strangers

2011-04-24T12:39:00.007Z

I suppose I must confess to being an anxious traveler. Richard used to tease me about getting dreadful travel anxiety and I felt bad about it until I realised, he was the same. Even though he'd survived a month in Delhi in the 70's with no money AT ALL and traveled through Afghanistan and Pakistan, he always slept badly the night before we went anywhere and was short tempered on the way to the airport. So traveling by myself in a fairly fragile state of mind to somewhere I'd never been before was challenging to say the least. The first time I traveled to Rome to meet Lena in early March, I was quietly terrified. I'm not scared of the flying in fact that's the best bit for me when you don't have to appear as if you know what you're doing and where you're going. It's the arriving that scares the hell out of me. Trying to figure out where you need to go to catch the bus or maybe having to (God forbid) ask someone a question in a foreign language. So it was with huge relief that I met Brad as we waited in line for the Ryanair flight at Stansted airport. I asked him if he was going to Rome for a holiday and he answered in perfect English with a slight American accent, "No I live there!". Thus an amazing friendship was born. Brad and his wife Tamara are having an adventure in Rome, living there for a while with their two children and soaking up as much Italian culture as they can. They were incredibly generous toward Lena and I and put us up Royally on my second visit. Here is Brad with their youngest son Nick and Lena after we'd taken Nick unicycling on the island in the centre of Rome. Tamara is the same age as me and we got on like a house on fire. You can see it in this look as she sat making a small animal out of felt and I sat admiring a piece of fabric she'd brought back from Perugia.
They took us out for lunches and dinners and an amazing night at the American Academy. It was the 400th anniversary of Galileo's unveiling of the telescope. Here are some words from the Academy website...
"The American Academy’s Casa Rustica (in the present Bass Garden) occupies the precise site where, on Thursday 14 April 1611, Galileo made his first demonstration to a learned audience in Rome of his new invention, named on this occasion as the “telescope”. That evening represents the baptism of Galileo’s device as a true scientific instrument, as well as its inaugural presentation for scrutiny by members of the Church."
The building was amazing....
There was free sparkling wine..
strange artistic installations...
fascinating people to talk to and the night was not too cold...it's a pity this photo is so blurry as the trees I'm standing under were flowering cherries in perfect bloom.
It was however a little overwhelming the next day for me to be pitched into this many people on the Spanish steps after the sleepy village of East Harling.
Still it was wonderful to stroll along in this kind of sunshine.
happening upon incredible sculpture wherever you looked.
the macro...
and the micro...
Lena and I sat on their balcony on my last day and raised a toast with blood orange juice to the kindness of strangers and their incredible hospitality.

Love stops war...

2011-04-19T14:26:00.005Z

My favourite painting from the recent trip to Rome was one Lena and I discovered at the "Castel Sant’Angelo". The castle was jam packed with tourists as we'd found ourselves there in the middle of culture week and all the large State owned museums & sites were free. Everyone seemed intent on simply getting to the top and then just as quickly getting back down again to the bottom. We were transported through the castle by a continuous flow of people and found a rare and quiet spot somewhere near the top where this painting hung in its' newly restored state. I still can't quite work out why no one was stopping to look at this absolute gem painted by Guercino called "Marte Furibondo Ritenuto da un Amorino" which literally translated means "Mars furious, is restrained by Cupid" or more usually "When love stops war".
I copied the picture and the following text from a great website; 'In Rome now' ..... "Francesco Barbieri, known as Guercino (1591-1666), was one of the most admired and sought after painters of his day. As a young boy, he taught himself the craft of painting before leaving Cento, the small town near Ferrara were he was born. He was influenced by deep, rich colors, applied loosely in the Venetian way, and the new, more intimate manner of interpreting religious themes from careful study and emulation of Ludovico Caracci’s "Madonna with St. Francis", the town’s one great artwork, which hung in a local church.
Along with Guido Reni, Domenichino and Lanfranco, Gurecino was a major exponent of the Scuola Bolognese, a group of Baroque artists who turned away from the idealized beauty of the early Renaissance in pursuit of naturalism. Guercino preferred his subjects to look real. Once he overcame the rigid configuration seen in his earlier works, his attention to naturalism was revealed in meticulously painted hands and faces held together by the movement of swirling robes and theatrical stances."
I love how the tiny, naked baby hangs onto the sword arm of Mars, the God of War stopping him mid stride and how Mars has the classic pose that Carravagio used as a device of the left arm and right leg forward at the same time making the figure twist toward you.

Roma due

2011-04-17T14:18:00.008Z

When I discovered that Lena was going back to Roma and was going to be staying with our new best friends Tamara and Brad, I jumped at the chance to meet her there again. I also took the opportunity to deliver a cushion for Tamara. She has excellent taste and this flower cushion fitted right in to the rest of the decor.

We hit the streets as well and you can see me looking slightly apprehensive here, as I try my luck with the mouth of truth.
One last look at the detail of that cushion.
I forgot to bring my camera cable so these are the only shots so far of this second trip to Rome. When I get home, I'll upload a few more. Ciao for now.

Lena

2011-03-15T19:10:00.008Z

One of the few good things about being single and living in the UK is that Europe (and the opportunity to get there) is so close. Without thinking twice (well actually with a great deal of angst) I gave in to my niece Lena's wishes and met her in Rome.
It was so good to see some sunshine and so good to see her that I didn't really care if I saw any ancient art or architecture at all.
Lena has always been great fun with a dry sense of humour and an observant and sensitive way about her. It was an absolute pleasure to hang out with her as she showed me the sights of Roma.
Without her cheeky sense of naughtiness, I would never have climbed up to the top of the stairs at the institute of architects and gone onto the roof!
Would never have let myself wander the streets looking for the best ice cream....
and coffee.....
bread...
and pizza.
While following along in Lena's shadow though, I did get a glimpse of the ecclesiastical side of Rome, in shops like this...
and this I remembered that I loved studying Art history at Art school and these amazing figures in the Four Rivers Fountain by Bernini on Piazza Navona were unbelievable up close. How clever to show someone taking off their shirt beside a clear pool and the detail on that palm tree was incredible.
I'd seen photos of the Colosseum so many times before but I never realised it was beside a hill.

Secret sisters

2011-02-23T12:43:00.002Z

I've been hiding out in the workroom since I came back, trying to just knuckle down and work. It's been fine actually as the weather's been crappy and I've been loving listening to the radio from Australia and the UK. This morning on Woman's hour they interviewed these very talented sisters so without further ado, I bring you the the Secret sisters

The old Dart

2011-02-13T12:07:00.007Z

Thanks to Richard's Mum and Dad who came as ten pound Poms to Melbourne on the 17th of September 1960 (a year after I was born), my heart is forever divided into two hemispheres. The flippant decision I made in 2003 to live in England had rippling consequences that I had no idea of when I said yes so easily to Ricardo's proposal of marriage on the far south coast of Australia in Eden after our brief 3 weeks of knowing one another.
My trip this time to Australia was subconsciously a trip to answer the question "Where in the world should I live". I feel that having only lived in England with Ricardo the Magnificent; if I moved back to Australia, my time in the UK would turn into a fairytale of happiness and calm. A Brigadoon that no one in Australia could ever fully understand, with Richard as the leading man in a world that simply disappeared after his death. What I found in Australia however was the same care and concern that I have here in East Harling and it's made it even harder to answer the question that goes round and round in my head every day.
Here are the last photos I took while I was away. This one first of all of my little shadow, confidante and therapist Olive Honey.
Haven't seen much of this lately!
Is it being on holiday that provides a sense of ease or is it just a case of the weather. Here is Roxi proving that life is just a bowl (or arm) of cherries. Another sunny day, swimming at North Melbourne pool.

Here she is with her diamond Python Lix.
The fabulous tomato stall at the Vic Market.
unbelievable seafood.
Unbelievable cakes too at Brunetti's in Carlton. (We had one of these for our engagement party and I'd kill for a piece right now.)
Bircher muesli and fabulous coffee at Heide's Café Vue with my darling Sis on her birthday.
The Christmas beetle that crossed our path on the walking track near Sue's house.
Here too are the last photos of Singapore with its amazing abundance of good food.
and its wonderfully multicultural side streets. Although if you look closely you can see that one of these garlands is made of lawn clippings which would be mighty uncomfortable and probably necessitate....
This...So its farewell to friends and family and amazing food and warm evening walks.

Yakety yak

2011-01-22T11:18:00.010Z

Prepare yourselves for a thesis on "The Domestic"... one of my favourite topics.............................
Now that women have a great deal more equality in the Western world and are spending less and less time at home, the previously undervalued domestic skills that are being lost are now much more highly valued. There is a new celebration of the domestic and a tidal wave of interest in craft blogs, fabric sites, knitting classes, cooking shows on TV and film.
My friends and relations are no exception to this and have taken pleasure in showing me how the revolution is progressing in Melbourne and Sydney.
My new best friend Ro Cook is one of these talented women who has successfully combined the two worlds of domestic arts and business. She's been such an inspiration and one of the reasons I stayed longer than anticipated in Sydney. Ro got some work sewing for a theatre production company in Sydney and was making more money per hour than I ever have, suddenly I realised it was possible to make a living from sewing, my confidence was greatly restored and I felt I had a worthwhile skill. Part of the remit was to sew a linen lining onto a yak skin!!! We had such a great time, her sewing and me yakking (well she did quite a lot of yakking too).
Ro had to buy fabrics for the job and she took me to some of Sydneys best fabric shops. Here are some photos of the fabrics at Remnant Warehouse for you to dive into. Something about the colour and texture of textiles has a beneficial effect on me. It's almost magical how restorative it is.
The other restorative factor has been Jim Conway and his wife Helen. Laid back and lovely, these two. Most days Jim would let me have a cry and a reminisce about Ricardo.
They took me to the Leichardt organic farmers market on Saturday morning for sago puddings, sugarcane juice, steamed lemon myrtle muffins and shiny apples.
Then Helen and I went to yet another fabulous swimming pool. (I hope I don't make you all too jealous with all the sunshine going on here.) This time it was the Dawn Fraser pool. The oldest pool and swimming club in Australia.
A heavenly view on a hot day. The pool lies in a small cove in Sydney's harbour and is tidal so at times there is a beach with sand for sandcastle making at the swimming pool.
There was no one around at this upper level changing area that reminded me of a Victorian cricket pavilion.
and no one eating a Vegemite sandwich at this picturesque pit stop.

Sad, wet or mad?

2011-01-19T10:31:00.013Z

A week or so ago I came to Sydney on the train. An 11 hour trip of empty seats,
plenty of time to read
and rain, rain, rain. I've never seen country Victoria look so green nor the rivers so full.
But 11 hours is a long time to think all by yourself even if you are accompanied by good books. No one to play cards with, no one to laugh quietly about the other passengers with. The rain was a perfect reflection of how I felt.
So I was thrilled to be met at Central station by one of Richard's brothers in all but biology, Mic Conway. Here he is with his beautiful AND talented wife Ro and the ever patient and shameless Gypsy.This was the view out of Mic's van.
The fabulous view of the Glebe bridge.
I have been staying with Mic's brother Jim and sister-in-law Helen. The Conway brothers have been treating me like royalty and I have been so very grateful. First up Mic took me to the Leichardt pool, 50 metres of pure paradise on a hot summers day. Luckily Mard had given me a fabulous Esther williams bathing suit so I was into that water quick smart.
The next day Helen took me to the Redleaf pool. A perfect pool in Sydney's Double Bay. No sharks because of the fence around the pool. Quite a walk down very steep steps so by the time you reached the top you felt like going back in again.

Then a few days later the lovely Kerry Dwyer
took me past amazing gardens and a winding path
to another spectacular pool at Coogee. This time an ocean pool. (Those bathers have really been getting a work out)

Some kids had been snorkeling in the rocks and found these living bits of seaweed. Beautiful black sea slugs.
Later that night after swimming with Kerry, Jim & Helen took me out to a film preview that their friends the Pigram brothers play music in and helped produce called "Mad Bastards". It screened at the Sydney Uni quadrangle. A remarkably English building on a very un-english balmy night. The film was great if a little hard to hear because of the echoing site, but the Pigram Brothers playing beforehand was a rare treat.
We indulged in a little celebrity spotting!!!

As Molly Meldrum used to say "Do yourself a favour" and listen to this wonderful youtube clip of the Pigram brothers. Let it transport you to North Western Australia.

Relaaaaaaax

2011-01-10T00:37:00.005Z

Sorry I've been absent from the blog for a while but it's actually been quite nice to have a rest from the computer. I've had time to read, and my friend Mardi has provided me with some great books. To start with... Alex Miller's "Lovesong" and next up will be "The swan thieves" by Elizabeth Kostova. For this very reason I have booked a ticket to go to Sydney by train, just think of the luxury of 10 whole hours on a train with a couple of good books.
Mardi has the most amazing heart shaped life here in Eltham, Victoria, Australia with her wonderful husband Macgreg and indeed as a portent of what was coming, she was born with a heart shaped map on one arm.
The wonderful Macgreg is a truly renaissance man and can turn his very talented hand to anything. There are amazing bits of sculpture all over their property like this...
and he's building a bungalow for daughter Sunday May out in the backyard..
It has been incredibly hot here and there has been a lot of swiming in the pool but today it's a beautifully cool 20 degrees and so the pool has been abandoned for more indoor pursuits.
Here's their dog Blue (the perfect mix of Blue Heeler and Jack Russell) getting snuggly on the couch.
and the very gorgeous Olive Honey lazing about with Lamby...

Thank you my wonderful 2nd family for giving me the precious gift of a little bit of time to relaaaaaax.

Upside-down-under

2010-12-26T03:57:00.007Z

I have only now had time with a computer at Suzanne Ingleton's (Roxi's Mum) in Castlemaine, to actually post these photos that I took before Christmas when I went for 3 glorious days to my favourite place in the world...Wilson's Promontory National Park.

I went with my wonderful sister and my sisters in all but biology, Mardi and Sally and their extended and very precious families. Here is Mard, leading the way for me with her beautiful liquorice allsort towelling back pack on that she made.
Blue sky anyone?
Here we are walking on a cool morning to Tidal overlook.
THE GIRLS
It's been wonderful to be surrounded by people who all sew and are as obsessed by fabric as much as me. One of the reasons I snapped Richard up so swiftly was that he could sew.
These guys are seasoned campers and even brought.......the Christmas decorations.

It was quite cold though for the first night or two and I wore every piece of clothing I brought with me, including my showerproof coat to bed each night. (Thanks Clarribelle for the lend of your MOST beautiful soft, warm and comforting scarf)

How's this for camping perfection?

From 3 to 28

2010-12-14T09:20:00.009Z

For those of you who haven't seen me for a while I just thought I'd update you on where on earth I am. I'm struggling actually, (slightly dazed, jet lagged and hot) to know WHERE on earth I am.
For weeks I've been freezing my bum off in Norfolk with ice and snow (not that I'm complaining as ice and snow at this time of year still seems so exotic to me). Now I'm perspiring copiously in Singapore, staying with my friends Mary and Andrew on my way back to Melbourne for Christmas.
This is the walk we went on this morning through the jungle.

After the walk it was time for lunch. Tofu that tasted like fragrant citrus, slender eggplant in an aromatic chilli dressing and those most wonderful salty fish, ikan bilis washed down with a glass of iced lime drink.
Then off to the beauty parlour for a pedicure...
Still need the wax....

Holy night

2010-11-29T22:39:00.006Z

For weeks now, Clarissa and I have wanted to go to visit Richard's grave; to take something there; to make a small ceremony; to reconnect with him somehow. We'd had a few ideas but neither of us seemed to have time; life kept getting in the way and I guess we were both a bit scared of being even sadder.
A few weeks ago we'd had a wonderful day in the woods collecting pine cones; reminiscing; crying and laughing. It was one of the loveliest days so far. We came home and made a wreath from the pinecones and it's been sitting outside Clarissa's house making us both feel guilty for ages now.
Finally tonight we managed some time together and a more perfect night couldn't have been imagined. It's been snowing heavily here for a couple of days now so it was a quiet white world that we stepped out into. We'd searched high and low at Clarissa's house for a torch but couldn't find one so we ended up with lanterns throwing swinging lights ahead of us. We walked down to the Church and through the lychgate, past the bell tower and down the slippery slope that leads to the grave yard. We stumbled over the bumps in the snow and found Richard's grave. We placed the wreath at his head and cried, and then laughed and then cried some more, did a bit of shouting at God and various other people, laughed and cried some more and then lit two sky lanterns that drifted up quite fast past the church spire and on toward Bridgham.
And now after searching and searching for the things that makes me feel a tiny bit better, I know what they are. It's tears and then laughter and then more tears with a truly great friend. That's all it takes.

Out and about with the Zebedoodle

2010-11-15T11:09:00.003Z

After the last very sad post posted from bed with a cold (or as Richard would say "in bed with the wog that's going round"), I thought we could all do with a bit of fun. Without further ado, I bring you a very small person who knows how to have fun even all by himself in a puddle...

And a beautiful poem from Roxi's Mum Suzanne......

Pueblo Blessing

Hold onto what is good

even if it is a handful of earth.

Hold onto what you believe

even if it is a tree which stands by itself.

Hold onto what you must do

even if it is along way from here.

Hold onto life

even when it is easier letting go.

Hold onto my hand

even when I have gone away from you.

Grief

2010-11-12T14:40:00.011Z

In these last days back from France, I've plummeted up and down. It was both hard and good to be in La Fosse de Tigne. Liz was a complete star though and surfed on the waves right alongside of me. But all things come to an end and now it's back to Norfolk and reality for me and it's been a really hard time.
I have been greatly comforted lately though by my beautiful friend Mardi who lost her wonderful Dad "Biggy" a while ago and has been a model of grace in grief if I ever needed one. Mard is the most wonderful photographer and also sent this photo of her Step-neice which has a perfect sense of peace about it.Mardi wrote to me about her experience of grief and I couldn't put it more eloquently so after receiving more of Mard's gracious permission, I bring you her amazing words......

I'm not sure that any words will help at this stage but I was  
reading an article in 'The Age' Good Weekend that Stephanie Dowrick  
wrote titled 'Grief and Consolation' and I thought of you. And having  
experienced loss myself I felt her words were ringing true for me  
too...  
She wrote :  "Grief is extremely difficult for most of us to think or
talk about. It is also excruciating to bear. That makes it hard for
many of us to know how to give comfort to others when they are
grieving. It may also make it difficult to receive comfort, even when
it is sorely needed."
Stephanie goes on to explain that she has been reading a memoir by Virginia  
Lloyd called 'The young widow's book of home improvement'. A woman
who at age 32 met a lovely man, married him the following year then was a  
widow at age 34 !!
She writes :  "I have been transfixed by how skillfully Virginia
captures the complex and sometimes wildly varying emotions that we
lump together and call grief. There is nothing predictable about this
state of mind and heart. Even from one day to the next, but especially
in the earliest weeks and months, devastating grief can display itself
in many different ways.
Virginia writes  'At unexpected moments I found myself overpowered by
a wave of grief that swamped without warning... On occasion these waves
felled me: I dropped to the ground, slumped as if the puppet strings
I had been relying on to hold me up had failed.'
The physicality of grief is shocking for many people.
I've heard people say that it is as though their vital organs are wailing...
Your body might hurt as much as your emotional heart. Food tastes
like chalk. Your sleep is chaotic, and so are your dreams and thoughts.
It is difficult to concentrate and you may feel simultaneously
highly sensitive to other people and weirdly indifferent'.
Stephanie Dowrick goes on to talk about a unique pattern of reaction
as each of us will grieve in our own way. She says that rage and outrage
at loss is often part of the process and can include a sense of injustice.
Her final paragraph :
"At any stage there is no right way to grieve, nor any one right way to
console. Treating yourself compassionately and gently, and especially
accepting the unpredictability of grief's demands, helps a little.
So does accepting the consolation and concern of others, even when
their efforts are far from perfect."
Now back to Mardi's words.
In my own experience of grief I found those overpowering waves to be  
exhausting, unpredictable, debilitating, shocking and strangely  
calming afterwards. I had a strong image in my head of floating in the  
ocean, far out to sea, the waves appearing out of nowhere and crashing  
over my head. They were frequent and almost anything could trigger the  
next wave... but as the weeks passed the big waves started to come  
less often, still with the same amount of ferocity but more time would  
pass in between. I felt it as a kind of madness. I was equally sad and  
angry, furious really, that someone who meant so much to me could be  
gone. And it was incredibly physical, racked my body. It also made  
perfect sense that I could feel so sad but I was alone in it, felt  
that no-one really understood how I was feeling, even the people who  
were also grieving for the same loved one. We all have our own unique  
experience of that person and will grieve for them in our own way.
What really helped me accept my Dad's passing was to take him with
me.I had the idea that I ought to be able to let go, get over it, move  
on, blah blah, but I really didn't want to let him go... I was also  
judging myself in it, thinking I shouldn't be this sad or that it was  
going on quite a long time... So, instead of trying to let him go I  
started to imagine him with me, in the car or out somewhere I would  
imagine him enjoying the day as much as I was or think of him being  
around, close by. I carry him in my heart and he lives for me, in my  
memories and in my dreams. I miss him but still feel strongly  
connected. I'm comforted by that.
The pain is something that you incorporate into a new  
life that is different from before. And from my experience, the  
sharpness of that pain softens as time goes by ; the experience of the  
loss doesn't disappear it just changes.

La Fosse de Tigne

2010-10-28T17:10:00.005Z

After a long drive with Clarry and Zebby (thank you so much for a stress free travel experience) I arrived at London City airport.
The airport was full of businessmen and I was the ONLY person in an outfit that wasn't black or grey. As I sat numbly on the plane I felt that my whole life was black or grey and I had one of those moments when you feel that you really wouldn't care if the plane crashed into the Channel as long as it was quick.
However my darling Liz picked me up from Nantes airport and drove us home to her place and THIS is what I woke to this morning!
La Fosse is one of the most precious places in the Universe and Richard's soul hovers very close here.
We have stayed here year after year for the last 3 years helping Liz build it up to be a fabulous B&B.
And the main reason we loved it is because of Liz.
It's so good to be away from a million zillion pieces of paper that all have my life hanging in their balance. It's so good to be with a sympathetic friend and it's so good to have a little bit of sun on your head.
It's so beautiful and I'm so lucky that Richard left me the legacy of Liz and La Fosse.

The soul would have no rainbow if the eyes had no tears

2010-10-23T17:33:00.005Z

They say it takes a village to raise a child, and I think it also takes a village to look after a widow. Through the last few weeks and months I have had more grief and pain than I ever thought I could bear but I have also had more warmth, generosity and support than I ever expected or thought it possible to receive. I have felt bereft and alone at the same time as feeling loved and protected.
Here are a few of the wonderful people who have helped me in the last few days sort out bank accounts.....cancel passports,
massage my poor aching heart,
sing to me,
and feed me...

All when they had their own busy lives to lead. Thank you my darling friends of East Harling and the wider world. Here is Tony and Marianne Backhouse singing outside our house before leaving for their next workshop in Bath. (I'm so sorry that it ends sooner than it should.)

Sleep sleep sleep.

2010-10-22T15:01:00.001Z

Thanks to our lovely friend Peter Muhleisen I bring you a clip made in 1977 of Ricardo the Magnificent singing with Matchbox.

Something to cheer you all

2010-10-21T08:20:00.000Z

A moving, wonderful and appalling day.

2010-10-09T16:09:00.016Z

If this terrible thing had to happen in the world of Ricardo and Jo Ludbrook, it could not have happened in a better place. The good people of East Harling and Bridgham have provided the most supportive network one could ever wish for. Roxi and I have been hugged and kissed, cooked and cared for better than I ever thought possible in this day and age of disconnection and drift. My heart still hurts terribly and will for a good while to come, but it is also buoyed by all the friends we have surrounding us.
Here is a small record of the funeral that happened here on Friday the 8th October 2010 for Richard Kenley Ludbrook.

(There is audio of the complete service here when you click on the link (you will need to view/listen in internet explorer)).
It started at 3.30 at our house when Owen came with his horse and trolley. He apologised because the trolley was a little "rustic". I thought it perfect.The funeral directors loaded the coffin onto the trolley. Richard's brother Ray here added a last bunch of flowers.

Richard's favourite flowers were dahlias and luckily they were in abundance because of the time of year.
The sartorial Ricardo would have loved Annette's shoes
Two hemispheres collided here when Dylan in his wedding suit met Sally & John in their choir robes.
My darlings Clarissa and Yusuf.I think about 60 people walked behind the coffin to the Church
If you listen to the service you will hear what an amazing send off it was. How many people are lucky enough to have two vicars that knew them incredibly well to take their funeral?
After the service everyone was invited to join us at the side of the grave. I had no idea there were so many people attending, they poured down the ramp from the Church to the graveside.

Goodbye my beautiful boy.
Then there was a celebration of Richard's life at our friend William's place. All the baking mafia of Harling and Bridgham had made food for the event and the Church marquee was up to contain it all.
There were smiles then. And singing by Roxi
and Clarissa and even me as I gathered all my strength to sing Richard's favourite sing "Nobody like you". Backed the wonderful Paul, Janie and friends.
A truly wonderful and appaling day, can a heart be breaking and singing at the same time?It will be a long time before Harling sees another funeral quite so wonderful.

Richard's funeral details

2010-10-06T16:19:00.002Z

Dear friends, family and blogreaders all. Richard's funeral will be this Friday. The details are as follows.

Friday October the 8th @ 4pm
Church of St Peter & St Paul
Church Rd, East Harling NR16 2NB Norfolk, United Kingdom.
www.walkingwithyou.org.uk
Parking opposite the church

In lieu of flowers, donations can be made at the church (or online) for charities: The Big C (www.big-c.co.uk), Macmillan Cancer Support (www.macmillan.org.uk), and for the Church Bell fund.
In the true spirit of Richard's life, please come dressed to celebrate such a wonderful person. The last thing he would want to see in the church is a sea of black and grey, so please add a dash of colour to your outfit, as he added a dash of colour to our lives.The wake will follow on after the service,in the next village along at Bridgham.

The wake will be from 6pm
Please bring a bottle and a nibble type dish.x

We received a lovely message the other day in amongst the many from our friend Lizzie who wrote..."Richard lives on in us all. I can't believe that his humour, musicality, love and sharp suits have not in some way impacted on us and changed us in some subtle (or not!) way."

Ricardo sings La Mer

2010-10-04T06:30:00.004Z

For David Uden and all the others who have been asking me to put this back up on the blog.
With love....Joey

Farewell Ricardo the Magnificent

2010-09-27T07:40:00.003Z

Roxi made this beautiful compilation of images and music.
The song is the one that her Dad Richard used to sing to her to send her off to sleep and the one she sang to him to send him on his next adventure.

Richard Ludbrook Ave atque vale

2010-09-25T08:12:00.006Z

Our Darling Richard passed away last night at 9.30 at the Norfolk and Norwich Hospital with Roxi and I by his side. I knew it would be hard but I don't think I realised he really would never be coming home again. Here are some beautiful words from a suprising source.
"We can never lose anything that is good, never lose love or the memories of great happiness because they are true. I've come to the conclusion that only the eternal is real! And that means qualities that one loves in people - their humour, generosity, honour, kindness, gentleness etc are the reality: and can never die. They are the identity of the one one loves." Joyce Grenfell.
All my love to you my darlings reading this.
Joey x

Sublime-ness and sadness

2010-09-16T18:48:00.005Z

I wrote this to my friend Margaret last night at about 8.30 "I'm sitting on the bed with the computer on my lap listening to youtube clips of Ryuichi Sakamoto waiting to see how Ricardo fairs as he sits on the trunk at the end of the bed with a bowl at his feet to be sick into if he needs to. From the sublime to the ridiculous. We have however had a good day with breakfast and lunch staying down and a visit from the blessed Macmillan nurse Louise."....after I wrote that though things changed rapidly as they are wont to do at the moment. Richard took a few steps, reached the bathroom basin and threw up his entire days worth of meals as well as all the medication I had just managed to give him. Welcome to our lives at the moment.
Each day is governed by how much food I can get into him and each day it's a tiny amount. It's hell for a cook like me. I must have been an Italian Mumma in a past life. It fills me with joy when I see him eating a bowlful of something and despair when he shakes his head slowly at the table.
In other news to hand...Roxi is still here with us and each day I thank God for her presence. Home is a much nicer place with company and she is very good company indeed. She has improved life around here no end. She's a natural organizer and as tenacious as a terrier when it comes to getting a good deal! We have a pill tower (that miraculously refills itself without me having to do anything) and a new vacuum cleaner bought at a ridiculously low price on ebay.

I was having a sad moment at the kitchen stove before and wondered when I had ever been happy. I was looking through old photos with Richard at the dining table after that and found this lovely happy, snowy video that reminded me how happy I had been once. It will interest those of you who have been here lately and can not imagine how it would be here in the snow.

Janie & Peter

2010-09-08T10:06:00.003Z

Well we've said hello and goodbye to another lovely pair of friends. This time Janie and Peter Conway-Herron. Janie is a senior lecturer in creative writing at Southern Cross University in Australia. She's a writer too and the last time we saw them was in 2004 when she and Pete were traveling and researching her recent book Beneath the Grace of Clouds.
They have left East Harling now to continue their travels in Shetland to research the next book.

Janie has known Richard since 1965 when they both worked at The Pram factory in Carlton. Janie's brothers were the infamous Mick and Jim Conway of Captain Matchbox Whoopee Band fame. Richard played in the band with them. Here are a couple of videos, you may be able to spot Ricardo the Magnificent in the first one...

This second one is of the band before Richard joined but as I knew them when I'd go and see them at various dives around Melbourne. They were our favourite band.

It was at Mic Conway's National Junk Band's CD launch that I met Richard in 2002 and when I discovered he'd been in Captain Matchbox and sung the song "If I can't have Anna in Cuba, I think I'll see Esther in Spain", I was in love. Here they are singing "The land of Oz".

Better today

2010-09-03T09:21:00.006Z

Dear Blogreaders,
Things are a bit better today. I'm so sorry for the last depressing post. I think I just got sick of everyone asking me if Richard is alright when actually he's not. Sometimes it weighs heavily to have to keep everyone else up at the same time as me.
There are still good things happening here in our lives, like Liz Boorn-Hall who came to visit and made the best Moussaka known to man as well as the best plum cake.
and the ever cheerful Zebedee
with his best buddy Yusuf....
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Joey

Do not read if worried..

2010-09-02T14:38:00.003Z

This is a not very positive blog post...
You are warned not to read if you are prone to worrying about things that you can't do anything about.
Richard has been in hospital overnight to be drained.....this time 5.5 litres. It ABSOLUTELY exhausts him (and me too really). He can hardly walk or talk at the moment and just threw up his lunch, complete with pain killers and anti biotics.....back to square one. I wouldn't wish this slow and painful death on anyone. Sorry to not beat about the bush but....I don't know what else to say.
I still have Roxi here and I also have a friend Liz here from France.

Good and bad

2010-08-30T11:36:00.017Z

I've been wanting to post something for days but have been waiting until I had some good news to share. Well I'm sorry but there isn't any. You're probably not supposed to write a post when you're feeling down but here it is nevertheless.
The only good thing about it will be the pictures of Zebedee and friends that Roxi took a week or so ago when the lovely Louisa was still here. We did have a nice time and as you can see Zebbie had a wonderful time getting naked in the river at the ford at Snetterton
We filled the digger scoop with minnows and sat watching the fun.
The weather has been rainy with small patches of sun and that hasn't helped the mood here.
It feels like there are storm clouds on the horizon and I keep having dreams of being in the path of something huge and scary. I dreamt I was camped in the woods with no tent but still with a blanket and an airbed. I was lying down trying not to be afraid of the dark when I heard and then saw a herd of large deer approaching. I just lay there wondering if they would be able to see me lying in their path or whether I'd be trampled. Then it became more frightening as the deer became wolves. Would they see me, would they kill me. I had to wait and see and hope for the best. Which is exactly what I'm doing now.

Richard is gradually sliding. He's become shaky and confused and is so thin. He still thinks he can do stuff, so it's only when I'm on my hands and knees for the third time cleaning up a bowl of spilled soup or drink that he sheepishly lets me feed him. Only when he scalds himself in the shower that he realises he's forgotten which way it is to turn the tap off. Yes the Ludbrooks are a stubborn bunch.
Roxi and I have changed his medication lately as we thought that was the problem, however it seems when we stop his anti nausea pills - he throws up and when we stop his nerve pain killers - the pain returns. There is no easy solution.
He has been going into hospital to be drained regularly and his skin is stretched now so he can last a fortnight. The next draining is booked in for this Tuesday. Hopefully there will be some relief then.
However he and I managed to get out yesterday morning to the most beautiful Church nearby in Larling.
As it says on the Norfolk Churches website.."This is a church in which to imagine the ploughman learning his catechism, the blacksmith and the wheelwright seated side by side."
This Church is in the tiny hamlet where Richard first came back from Australia to live in the UK in 1969. He lived at Shrubb farm cottages, one of the oldest surviving communes in the UK. It and the friends he made then are the reason we live in this part of the world. It is indeed a wonderful community here and we are so cared for. Often when we open the door, Tony Fry has left a punnet of homegrown raspberries and some beans, Jan Francis has left some perfect courgettes from her Father Rod's allotment or someone has left an anonymous donation in an envelope. I never feel like I'm forgotten or on my own but still it's a lonely existence losing the one you love.
There is love though surrounding us and as my Mum says "No love is ever wasted".
I leave you with a wonderful picture of Zebedee coming home from the river on Yusuf's shoulders. Happy as the day was long.
All my love comes to you who read this blog, I know there are a lot of you now and I'm so thankful for your comments and emails.

Sue Thomas

2010-08-19T16:03:00.010Z

It's the second last day that my Sister Sue is here making our life better in the UK. What shall we do????
I know let's take her to a STATELY HOME....which one though, we can't go too far nor spend too long....maybe one that's amazing outside and...
...amazing inside.
Blickling Hall. Perfect. Only an hours drive away yet a million miles away from everyday cares.
The sun shone. There weren't too many tourists as we were rather late in the day after having the essential cream tea in the restaurant.
Here are the three of us, Sue, Roxi and I but the person who's taking the photo is Louisa, Richard's niece who has come over for a week. Louisa the bold, Louisa the brave, Louisa the incredibly brainy. (There will be a post devoted to her soon too I promise)
In the mean time......What a hedge!
What gardens!
What a dining room!
What a kitchen!
WHAT A BEDROOM!
Phew.....I needed a long rest in the "Long room".
But there was fun to be had with the girls outside in the "Parterre". If you click on these pictures they will show you the fun that was being had.

Roxi found the biggest connect four in existence. Unfortunately we didn't have enough time for a game.
At one time Anne Boleyn lived at Blickling Hall and the spelling of the Boleyn name was variable. Sometimes it was written as Bullen, hence the bull heads which formed part of her family arms.
It wasn't only the Bulls heads which were noticed!
Then today we had to do the right thing and set her on her path back to her little brood in Melbourne who have so selflessly let her come for 6 weeks now. It was so amazingly good to have her here.
She's mothered us all as she knitted and played cards and cooked wonderful meals and kept us all in good humour. She will be sorely missed.
Quick there's the train.
Farewell Sue Thomas, travel safely all the way back home.
Thank you from the bottom of our very full hearts.

En Famille

2010-08-13T12:19:00.008Z

A lot has happened and yet nothing has happened lately. Richard is home with us again thank God. Maudie has been for 6 days and now it's time for Sue Thomas to go back to Melbourne and change with Richard's niece, Louisa who has come to visit for a week or so from Melbourne too.
Here are some photos from Maudie's visit and our morning rambles across Harling Heath, listening for Sky Larks.
I know, I know, no comments now about the apparel/umbrellas and the fact that it is meant to be summer.
Here is a rather lovely photo of Ricardo with Maudie at the hospital before he came back home.Here we are with Richard's brother Ray and sister-in-law Mary and Roxi in our remarkably suburban looking lounge room.
at the hospital sharing a "moment"
Back home with the other family, Clarry, Yusuf and Roxi looking at the inevitable and hard to resist; facebook (even though I'm trying to).
and one of me that Sue took when we managed to get a rare sisters moment together. Luckily it's in sepia and thus doesn't make me look as old as I am feeling at the moment.
I'll try and think of something more intelligent to talk to you all about when I get my act back together.

Big dipper

2010-08-09T18:25:00.004Z

Just a mini update for you all...
Richard WAS home last week for 6 whole days but went back into hospital early on Sunday morning (the 8th August)as he was in a lot of pain, hardly eating and feeling incredibly tight in his abdomen. I spent the day with him as we waited to be admitted; first into A & E then into Guist ward with all his old favourite nurses but minus the pooing and snoring bunch (small mercies).
I rang to see how he was feeling this morning and he was in top form. Had eaten all his dinner last night including the jelly and ice cream!!! (Note to self...must make more mashed stodge in future, not the usual gourmet fare) had a brilliant nights sleep and was keen for a game of our favourite card game...Yanif . Crikey, I can't keep up with him. So now it's back and forth to the hospital again always forgetting some vital piece of kit (toothpicks/pocket knife/nail clippers).
Hopefully they will drain him tomorrow and he'll be back home and thrashing us all at cards very soon.
I leave you with a lovely photo Roxi took a couple of weeks ago when Zebedee came to the hospital to visit. A real heart breaker.

Coming home!

2010-08-01T07:55:00.005Z

HE'S COMING HOME TODAY.

He's been in hospital for 4 weeks and I never thought he'd come home. It's been horrible trying to talk with him intimately while the other patients in the ward beep and groan and snore. There's been the odd episode of explosive diarrhoea (not Richard's I might ad) and codes blue when the guy in the next bed has a bad fit which is usually once or twice a day. Then there was the episode when Richard went off to go to the toilet and all hell broke loose in the corridor where I'd last seen him. Doctors came running from everywhere, they closed the doors to our ward and pulled screens around the doors and the patient on the floor and I was left silently and terrifyingly alone - only to see him shuffle out the door of the toilets blinking at all the noise that was going on around him. I've never been so glad to see him upright in all my life.
In other news to hand... the beautiful Maude has arrived from cold old Melbourne. Here she is in the English Bush with Sue Thomas and Roxi ready for our morning walk with the "poo machines", Carryll's dogs. (Yes it was raining)

Sisters and sisters is very very nice.
MY sister Suze and I managed to get an afternoon off and go to Wiveton café for scones and jam and cream........
....and a walk round the spectacular walled garden there.
yes there was some wildlife action too.

Diss and dat

2010-07-23T06:44:00.007Z

On Friday we took a little bit of time away from the hospital in the morning for Roxi and Sue to experience Diss auctions. It's an amazing rural Suffolk event that happens once a week, a sale of "deadstock" as they say here. With incredible and wonderful stuff. Here is a view of the approach..look at this lovely old tricycle in need of love and care.
I know someone whose husband would go crazy over this place.... Suffolk swift lawnmower anyone?
I'm sure Mr Macgregor has just ducked off to find the tap...
Here is Sue on the phone to Australia saying how incredible it all is and asking whether she could fit this wooden wheelbarrow into her luggage.
Here's Roxi behind an amazing pile-o-tea chests
You can find almost anything here. From immaculate virgins and saints....

....and really bad cherubic fountains
from a pile-o-sticks..
to a box of childs plastic shovels...could be handy for those with very messy dogs!
Don't think that Richard isn't in our thoughts every minute though. He's still in hospital but is a lot more chirpy still. They have managed to balance out his pain medication and he continues to be hungry which makes my heart swell as I see him cutting up white peaches with enthusiasm for his sweets after dinner.
I thought I'd add this beautiful little vignette from our lovely friend Tat who is a writer and lives on the shores of a loch in Scotland....I know she wont mind me posting it here...

Dearest Joey,

Last night I dreamed that I was lying by a river on a beautiful sunny day. It was early summer - the colours all bright and clean - and I was just lying on my back in the grass looking up at the sky, watching birds flying around. Then a tiny little kingfisher swooped down towards me. Without thinking, I put up my hand and the kingfisher landed on my forefinger. She was so small - more like a humming bird - and just sat there peering down at me. Her colours were beautiful - intense irridescent blue-green and orange-red. I was amazed and delighted and kept expecting her to fly away, but she stayed and stayed. When she did eventually fly away I just lay there feeling amazed and happy and blessed.

My dreams are almost uniformly bad - it's really unusual for me to dream of something so lovely. I wanted to send the kingfisher to you and Ricardo. Hope she reaches you soon.

Love, love, love,

Tat x

Zebedee turns 4

2010-07-20T07:07:00.007Z

For those of you new to the blog, I must tell you about our beautiful Godson Zebedee. Zeb was born very premature at 23 and a half weeks and was an absolute miracle baby that weighed 450grams.
He turned 4 on Monday and we had a birthday celebration for him on the weekend.
It was even hot...
Every year we take photos at this tree on the forest walk on the way to the river. Say CHEESE.

What more could a 4 year old want than a cupcake and his willy?
Often I'm here in the UK wishing my friends and family from Australia could see my life here in the UK and for once what do you know....they were. Sue Thomas sitting in the hammock with Clarissa's niece Florence
Roxi and Sue on the forest walk....
There were a few tears however.......
and yes it is a huge emotional time at the moment. Even apart from birthdays.
Here is the photo that always makes me sob....Zebedee the tiny and miraculous
Here he is with Ricardo two years ago at the river.
...and here getting to know each other when Zebbie was one.

Down but not out

2010-07-17T06:03:00.009Z

Yesterday we went to the hospital as usual and found a very confused and frightened Richard struggling to even breathe. It's so distressing to see him like that and I always think the worst but the liver team headed by the absolutely gorgeous Matty, decided that they would take some of the fluid away that was making him so uncomfortable. It worked a treat just like it did last time and he felt instantly better as the pressure of the fluid receded. I want to tell you that the staff at the Norfolk & Norwich hospital have been absolutely amazing. There is so much care in their faces and they've helped all of us individually as we sneak away for a cry. Holding our hands when we've needed it and being very, very genuinely concerned.

I don't feel it's appropriate to put photos up here of Ricardo at the moment in distress but I have been sitting here at my desk looking at old photos and videos of him that have put a smile back on my face and I thought I'd share them with all the newcomers to the blog so you don't have to search through the archives.
Here he is at William Fairbanks boating event at the river in Bridgham in June 2006.
and one of my favourites of him walking boldly ahead of me at Squeaky beach at Wilson's Prom in Australia in March 2005
Here's a video I took of him practising for a gig in April 2009

with George Washingmachine at Shoreham in Australia in January 2008
and a few other random videos that I found from ages ago that will show you his Royale magnificence.

Dylan

2010-07-13T06:15:00.006Z

One of the few good things about Richard being ill is that people have come from all over the globe to be with us. Here are some lovely photos of Richard with Dylan. Not too many tears now!
You should have seen Richard's face when Dyl walked into the ward. And his chest expanded exponentially as he told every person with eyeballs all about Dyl's architectural work and beautiful wife and kids. I think there may be a mass exodus of nursing staff to Singapore when Dyl's hospital opens there. I'll try and get the flash video of his lotus building that is being built on a lake in China.
It was so good to see them together.
Here he is being VERY brave at Heathrow airport as he says goodbye to his sister Roxi.
Thank you Dyl and thank you Steph, Asher, Elkan and Orson for sharing your husband and your Daddy with us for a while.
Luckily he leaves Richard in the capable hands of Roxi and SUE THOMAS.

Ricardo update

2010-07-11T08:40:00.004Z

Hi gang. Just a very quick update to say that they drained out 2 and a half litres of fluid from Richard's abdomen yesterday and as they did that his sense of humour drained back in! What a f#~*%ing relief. Will try and post some pictures soon.....this time with TEETH. So much love and help is surrounding us at the moment. Thank you all of you.

Love and support

2010-07-09T09:11:00.005Z

Well, Love and Support (yes they are CAPITALS) have been flooding in as things have taken a bit of a turn here. Richard went back into hospital last weekend in a lot of pain. He is now in Guist ward at the Norfolk and Norwich with a lot of fluid accumulatingand an infection in his abdomen. He's thin and scared but still very much Richard.
Dylan, Ricardo's stepson, and Roxi, Richard's daughter have both come from the other side of the world to see their Dad. (Dyl will be furious that I have put this not-so-attractive photo of him up but we are all looking a bit ragged). But he and Roxi have been unbelievably amazing.
This is what Richard looked like last week...when he and Roxi shared the "Commonwealth-heads-of-government" shorty pyjamas...

and this is what he looked like yesterday with Roxi trying to get rid of her double chins.
Dyl is an architect in Melbourne so we took him to see some of the sites of that Fine city of Norwich.

Here is a beautiful photo of Richard and Dylan and Maudie with their Mum, Sue Ingleton. (Maudie is trying to get here too but life keeps getting in the way).
As you can see Richard is in good hands....

Royal Norfolk Show

2010-07-01T19:50:00.008Z

Today Roxi and I went to the Royal Norfolk show!
I'd never been before.
It was an amazingly English experience. I had no idea there would be blokes dressed in bowler hats "stewarding" people, nor riding girls dressed in immaculately fitting tweed on a VERY hot day. The only rides available were a wonderful collection of antique merry-go-rounds and helter skelters.
We had a wonderful time looking at incredibly cute bunnies....
This one a Belgian Hare....
Some wonderful and bizarre chickens.
Check out this one's comb!
and this perfect lace wing.
Here's a close up of the perfect speckled hen.
We were amazed that they would go to these lengths to judge eggs. Something about cracking eggs to make an omelette came to mind.
We both loved the heavy horses there all dressed up and very proud of themselves. Check out this star.And here is Roxi with a huge and beautiful Percheron.
These pigs were too cute to miss.
and luckily we weren't sexually harrassed by any "Loose Sheep"

Fathers Day and more...

2010-06-21T08:49:00.008Z

This was going to be a post about Father's day but it's turned into a lot more. If you've got time, read on. If not just whiz through the pictures and know we had a great day with Ricardo for Father's day......
Here is the extended mix..........On Thursday last, the 17th June we drove to the tiny village Church where Richard was baptised in Kelsale in Suffolk to the funeral of his childhood neighbour Tony W.
For him it was a lovely chance to catch up with friends he hadn't seen for maybe 55 years. For me it was a nightmare of grief and fear. Ricardo had taken a sleeping pill the night before and had turned into a groggy, monosyllabic stranger. I have no experience of sleeping pills and their side effects, especially upon someone with liver cancer; I thought his illness had taken a turn and we were about to have to call an ambulance at a funeral. I didn't know a soul at the Church and Richard's wobbly state made everyone a little wary of him. You could see them wondering why were we attending this event? There was no way I could tell them the scenario. All I could see was the widow weeping in the front pew.
After the Church we went on to the tiny pub called the Poachers Pocket where Richard's Dad used to drink in the 1950's before they went to Australia. More memories. As we sat to one side of the beer garden, we managed to talk to the sister of the man who had passed away. To my further distress it seems Tony had died very quickly of liver cancer at the age of 60. Richard and I had to keep quiet and not ad any further grief to a sister's worries. As we drove away, I started to sob and ended up uncontrollably wailing as Richard tried to console me through his soporific haze. How could I explain to him how I was feeling? In the end I calmed down and slept as Richard drove the rest of the way to Heathrow where we had a room booked at a cheap Ibis hotel (which was actually really quiet, clean and nice) in order to wait for our darling ROXI to come and find us after flying all the way from Australia. Never was a daughter more needed!!!! Never was a daughter so amazingly up for the challenge and full of calm practicality. Thank you dearest Roxi.
So after catching up and calming down over the rest of Friday and Saturday we drove over to Wyken Vineyard for a Fathers day lunch. Not quite sure how much lunching would be done as there hasn't been a great deal of appetite lately. We did however manage to eat lunch then walk around the entire gardens then have afternoon tea as well. Crikey.Here is the lucky dad..
and all three of us squinting at that weird thing that appeared in the sky. Is it called a sun?
Roxi caught these peacock chicks with their Mumma. (All these photos in fact were taken by her)

What a beautiful tail.
This rose reminds me of that toothpaste you can get that spirals out of the tube in two colours.

The man himself. Chirpy now as it's the afternoon and all sleeping pills have worn off.

Roxi our shining star.
There are no bumblebees in Australia so they hold a particular fascination for us Aussies.

Ricardo & Joey go boating?

2010-06-13T16:09:00.006Z

On Saturday we had a few burly friends around for a fairly traumatic event...taking the roof down to the boat. Yes we have a boat 'Roxane' (named after Richard's daughter). She's been a dream for a long time and is having to be finished off to a much lesser extent than either of us would have liked and sold. She is a beauty and one of the reasons I fell in love with Richard was because he was the kind of adventuresome dreamer that had such a boat. She is a 27 foot long symphony in steel, a highly unusual small size for a boat with a steel hull. Called an Akerboom and built in Holland she's a coastal cruiser so not quite ocean going but more than just a river boat. She lies at a place called Isleham on the fens in Cambridgeshire.
I have never even sailed in her. It was always hard to get the time to work on her as Saturdays were the only days we could and only the fine ones at that, which meant half the year (at least) was out because of the weather.
Here are aforementioned burly lads helping to load the roof onto our friend, 'Bladesies' truck.
and here taking down the old ply wood bits that held up the old tarpaulin...
Richard struggled manfully on but was clearly exhausted by such emotionally charged stuff. Having to ask other people to help him with this has been a hugely humbling experience.
At last the roof was up but still needs to be set in place properly.
Checking out the work that's still to be done...
here's a picture from a while ago of Ricardo of the rippling muscles. He's rebuilt the whole 'Super structure' (top part of boat for us landlubbers) immaculately.
and lined the interior so beautifully...
We couldn't have done what we did today though without the help of wonderful, wonderful friends who are willing and happy to give up their time to help. Thank you Jon-boy, Pauly, Bladesy, and Gary.

Ricardo the Magificent sings "La Mer"

2010-06-05T18:05:00.003Z

Big wide world

2010-06-01T06:32:00.010Z

We went to Cley-next-the-sea on the weekend and had the most wonderful rest. I wasn't sure whether I was doing the right thing: cutting us off from support with no mobile phone coverage but it was the best thing we could possibly have done. At first it was just Cheeky monkey and me going for long walks at ungodly hours in the mornings. A bit sad and lonely but....
...it was so beautiful and peaceful and quiet out there on the marshes...except for all those NOISY BIRDS

Ricardo benefitted hugely from the salty air and lots of rest...
We even managed to get out and about a bit, with Clarry & Yusuf to the Wiveton Café and I had enough make-up on to not look too knackered
Cheeky monkey even got to play some Yarnuff.
The architecture at Cley is lovely and I was dreaming of a Georgian house by the sea...

and the gardens were so beautiful with roses just starting and Columbines everywhere...
On the way home we dropped in at a favourite garden of mine at East Ruston

Unbelievably beautiful.
Check out the size of this peony.

Soldiering on

2010-05-26T07:12:00.003Z

Hello lovelies. Just so you don't think we've dropped off the edge of the planet after the last bit of extra horrible news; we are still here and still soldiering on.My friend Caryll has gone on a holiday so I'm needing a morning walking buddy. Ricardo was happy to oblige. So his Buns-o-Steel are staying nice & steely.
We are heading to North Norfolk this weekend to a lovely B&B that some friends have organised for us to go and stay at. Check it OUT I can't wait. It has been so hectic and so hard to sleep for worry that I'm hoping we can relax a bit once we get there.

Must pack the Superman outfits as my freind Jenny sent this lovely email this morning...

"Just wanted to send you both love and let you know that I'm praying for a miracle for you both. And why not? After all you've already shared so many miracles. The miracle of finding each other in a world of 6.6 billion people. The miracle of being truly content with each other, without the need for heaps of material stuff to insulate you against life. The miracle of sharing stuff and enjoing the world together. The miracle of inspiring old cynics like me to believe that blissfull, true love and contentment is possible over the age of 30! I know that you'll make the most of the time you have, because that's what you do anyway. Keep wearing the superman outfits and dancing!"